Finding Mr. Right: When Rebounding Is All Wrong


Rebounding to an ex-boyfriend says a lot about a woman. That can be good or bad–depending upon the reasons for the original break-up.

If, for example, the guy (a) played around on you when you were together, (b) neglected you and your children (c) used you as his meal ticket, then the smartest thing you ever did was to find the exit door.

And the stupidest thing you can do is allow him back into your life, now or ever.

(Brit: does any of this sound familiar? I’m not being too subtle here…)

Need a few other reasons to steer clear?

Okay, here are 5 other reasons you’d be a fool to take him back:
  1. He spends more time with his guy pals than with you.
  2. He feels he was forced into the commitment–and shows it with blame games and by going A.W.O.L.
  3. He’d rather work long hours than be home with you.
  4. He admits it: he’ll always be more loyal to another woman – be that an ex, an old flame, or his mom.
  5. He shows no interest at all in sex with you. (Well, at least Britney can cross this item off her list!)

And yet, you’re willing to turn the other cheek, to let bygones be bygones?

Silly, silly girl.

Based on the criteria above, you’ve got to face up to at this very important issue:

For whatever reason, you don’t feel worthy of a loving, committed relationship.

Is there a right reason to rebound? Yes. Here’s when you should run back into his arms:

  1. He is the right man, and this is the right time to be with him. In relationships especially, timing is everything. If fate dictates that you are both available, attracted to each other, and ready to take your relationship to the next level, it’s certainly worth giving the relationship another chance.
  2. You’ve come to your senses. He treated you well when you were together-and you didn’t appreciate it at the time. Ready to settle down? Start by looking him up. In his mind, you may have been “the one that got away.”
  3. He’s finally grown into the man you knew he could be. Again, timing if everything. If new life experiences have given him the depth of maturity that make him a better person, reward him with your friendship and your love.

Remember, relationships must continually evolve in order to survive–and to succeed.

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Alex Wise served over 5 years as relationship expert helping women from around the world figure out the men in their love lives from an honest, male perspective. Alex is one of the contributors and editors for dating website. He is passionate about thought leadership writing, and regularly contributes to various career, social media, public relations, branding, and online dating communities.