When a woman meets a man, she wants to determine whether or not he’s relationship material. There are three questions she always asks: What do you do for a living? What kind of car do you drive? And, where do you live? Don’t be offended guys. Sure, these questions all point towards financial status, but there are plenty of other reasons she’s asking these questions.
Men like talking about themselves. It makes them feel relaxed and confident. These questions allow the man to talk and take the pressure off the woman doing all the talking, which can make her look like a “chatterbox.” She may not be sport savvy enough to talk about the Final Four or the NHL Playoffs, and she may want to avoid a heated political debate about the Middle East or the mid-term elections. And, she knows you don’t want to talk about shopping! Asking about your work, car, and home are ice-breaker subjects that are easy for you to talk about and also interesting to her.
Follow the format of other Wednesday blogs in regard highlighting and spacing Cars tell her about your personality and status. According to a study from Rice University, “driving a Porsche communicates that you’re interested in uncommitted sex.” A man who drives a BMW sedan or an Audi is probably upscale and practical. He is not spending beyond his means and is more likely to be family-oriented than say a Porsche or Ferrari driver. Your car does give her an indication of your success, which is important to her if she’s looking for a responsible man who can provide for his family, but it’s also a topic in which many women are well-versed.
Any smart woman knows that a man defines himself through his career. She also knows that its an easy subject for you to talk about, and since she probably doesn’t have the same career, she will be able to ask lots of questions and keep the conversation flowing. It’s not just about how much Louis Vuitton you can afford. Your job does give her a peek into your financial status, but it also gives insight into your lifestyle and personality. Whether you’re a workaholic, a take-charge, career-driven person or someone who is less driven may be a plus or a minus in her books. A Hedge Fund manager may have great wealth, but may not have time for a relationship and family. A man in a creative job, such as an actor or musician, may not have the financial security to raise a family, but may have a more flexible schedule. Finding out about your career, the time constraints it imposes on you—whether you travel or work late hours—gives her an indication as to how much time you would have for a relationship and family. If you travel endlessly and work 80-hour weeks, you probably don’t have time for her.
She is asking about your home in part to get an idea of your neighborhood, but also to see how committed you are to that neighborhood. Whether you prefer a yard, privacy, city living or apartment living are important factors in determining long-term compatibility. If you see living in a downtown loft as your permanent lifestyle and she wants children and a house in the suburbs, you may not be able to find common ground. She also wants to know if you are living in a home you shared with another woman. Every woman wants a fresh start with decorating and making a home her own. Talking about the home lets her know if you are flexible and open to change. It also shows if you have a nesting instinct if you care about your décor. All women love decorating, so your choice in living space is a subject she can easily discuss.
Don’t be offended if she asks these three questions on a first date. While she may be
evaluating your qualifications for boyfriend or husband, she may also just want to get to
know you better.