How To Be a Dating Wild Card


Being a wild card definitely has its advantages.  You’ve always got an ace up your sleeve, and your lucky date never knows what to expect next – only that it’s going to be thrilling. But, it’s not easy to do.  Not everybody can have the devil-may-care, let the chips fall attitude of a James Dean or a Steve McQueen. But, you can.

You’re a maverick. Not an old, crusty maverick-by-default like John McCain. You’re still kicking asses, occasionally taking names, and thrilling the ladies left, right and center. Well, most of the time. But, you can only take a girl to the secret dive bar you know about so many times before it’s definitely not a secret. You need some new pages in your playbook, so when you’re looking to try out some new moves when you’re playing the field, try these tips on how to be a dating wild card.

Create Something

Like a mighty god on high, rend something from nothing with your special lady to show her that you can create where there once was nothing. Or, at the very least, go to one of those pottery classes or couples’ cooking classes. Worst case scenario is that you come out on the other end with a totally sweet ashtray that you can give to your mom. Best case, you come out with a totally sweet lady you can bring home to her. “I had a guy take me to a cocktail making class once,” said Shannon 26. “We got a little bit tipsy, and that combined with seeing his authority behind the bar definitely made me want to take him home. So, you know, I did.”

Risk Something

There are no rewards without risk. Somebody important said that, and they probably knew it takes more than a trip to Red Lobster during Lobsterfest to woo a woman of discerning tastes (Ed. Note: probably not a lot more, though, as Cheddar Bay Biscuits are a known aphrodisiac). Try risking something financial by going in together at a casino. Even if you don’t win, the thrill will charge the evening. If that’s not your style, try risking something physical. Go bungie jumping or take a trip to a gun range. The closer you get to the red line of actual danger, the more of an endorphin release you get as you retreat making you and your lady extra touchy feely.

Do Something Scary

Like go to a psychic. Or go a roller derby. Or go to a bar where nobody speaks English. The idea here is to purposefully put you and your date into a situation that neither of you is comfortable in, and hopefully, even a little scared. Why would you do that? Well, because Dr. Susan Block says it’s going to make her feel amorous.

“Halloween is almost here, so let’s consider sex and fear. Isn’t that what it’s all about? Forget the candy, the costumes. It’s the fear that captivates your soul. Fear is one of those feelings that makes you feel really alive, your heart beating like a time bomb, your temperature rising, your senses on red alert. Fear can be erotic, in part because whatever we fear, it all springs from fear of the unknown. And the unknown, uncharted territory is one of life’s great aphrodisiacs.”

Plan Something Unplanned

Dating is a lot like a Choose Your Own Adventure novel. You’ve got to be constantly thinking about your next move – prepared for things that are nigh unpreparable (?) for.   Use your iPhone for this. Use a combination of the Axe Roulette dare application, Yelp, and – when you’re on the fly – Google Goggles to constantly be evaluating your options as you progress through the date. There’s no doubt that a midnight walk down the beach is a solid plan A. But, when you walk by a new sushi place so underground it doesn’t even have a name and see the chef using a full size sword to make salmon sashimi, you’ve got to be able to roll (get it?!) with that.

Make/Break a Rule

Dating is a little like a game in a lot of ways.  There are certain rules that basically everybody abides by – the guy at least offers to pay, (usually) no sex on the first date, no dating your friends’ exes, etc.   But, there are smaller rules that are meant to be broken.  The cliche move that might have worked once in the late 70s is to say, “let’s kiss at the beginning of the date and get the awkwardness out of the way.”   Right idea, but the wrong execution.  Try a few of these, or better, make up your own brand of romantic japery you creative cocksman,  you! 1) No first names. Just pet names. 2) No bragging; you can only say negative things about yourself. 3) You must use the word ostrich at least once every half hour.