Reader Question: How To Date Multiple Women


Why is it so hard to figure out how to date multiple women at once without much effort? Here are some simple strategies and actions to help you date multiple women at the same time…

Dear Loveawake,

I’ve been dating 4 different girls and wondering how I will juggle them this coming weekend. Each of them is texting me like crazy and vying for my time. It’s a problem I’ve never had before. Advice, please.

-Dude X

This is a common problem for guys who have had a bit of success with women, but haven’t developed the management skills needed: Why is it so hard to date multiple women at once without much effort?

Well, it’s not all that hard, but you gotta change your thinking first. Then you can start to develop some real management skills.

How To Date Multiple Women: It Starts Here

Most guys enter the whole “Dating Community” with some experience when it comes to women. Many have had long-term girlfriends before, but it’s usually been one at a time; sequential rather than simultaneous.

Once they start reading the standard ‘dating’ fare, studying the videos, and even attend some ‘Bootcamps’ out there, they begin meeting more women and then suddenly they find their lives spinning out of control as their social calendar overloads, text messages coming at them from all directions, and women all over the place whining and whinging for attention.

(Yeah, such a problem! you might say. But trust us, it gets old really fast, and there’s something decidedly un-masculine when a guy sits in Starbucks by himself for hours at a time, just staring zombie-like at his Smart-phone while typing away furiously.)

Most of the material out there just talks about getting the girl, but not about how to maintain an even keel and keep things flowing smoothly and easily.

Today we’ll discuss a few of the key elements guys need to be aware of in order to take control of their lives and time in order to have more success with women, and a whole lotta less aggra, besides.

How To Date Multiple Women: Stop The ‘Magical Thinking’

Keep in mind most of what we’re advocating here challenges a lot of the limiting beliefs rampant in the Seduction Community, but if guys are intellectually honest and do their best to objectively challenge their assumptions, they’ll come out at the other end with a much better self-image and improved self-esteem as they better learn how to not only separate the chaff from the wheat, but get out of the granary altogether and search for more nutritious fare.

Just as having the right ‘internal state’ or ‘inner game’ is pretty much irrelevant when a semi is barreling down on one at 70 mphs – way too many guys drank the ‘Inner Game will solve all my problems’ kool-aid and then kid themselves into believing that right action will just ‘magically’ occur and they’ll be naturally walking the path of success with women if they simply strive to be void of ego, centered in their Infinite Mojo, dipping deep into the Eternal Nimbus, and other such claptrap (sadly, this is all stuff we’ve seen pushed onto too many guys whose only real problem is that they aren’t meeting enough women).

Sure, it feels really groovy to believe ‘I am enough and I can do anything, I am the Prize, I can Lead Her and Endure Her Tests, my Internal State continues to change as I push my personal boundaries to learn and grow, blah blah blah,’ but none of that crap is gonna save you when girls are burnin’ up your text Inbox and you haven’t got a plan in mind to arrange and prioritize your dancecard.

It’s the fallacy of ‘Magical Thinking’ in action when one is existing simply at effect, flying by the seat of one’s pants, and basically living on a wing and a prayer. Sure, it’s exhilarating yes, but hardly measured and steady.

So let’s just stop with all the airy-fairy, feely-goody gobbledygook and give you some nuts and bolts to get your woman thang under control.

How To Date Multiple Women: Simplify

First off, ixnay the uggling-jay; it’s un-manly.

‘Juggling’ implies a situation that’s out of control, requiring lots of time and energy to keep shit from spilling all over the place and making a mess.

Rather, manage your ladies and manage your time.

Yes, we date multiple women at the same time until we find one we really like and go exclusive with her. We schedule these ladies throughout the week for lunches, dinners, and fun times afterwards.

Since none of them are our exclusive girlfriend, we don’t see any of them on the weekends. We keep our weekends free to hang with our buddies, enjoy our manly hobbies, and keep the ladies guessing as to who we’re with, what we’re doing, and where we are.

Once you give a girl a weekend, she’ll expect it ALL the time, and when you slot in a different lady to take her place, she’ll most likely get all upset and give you no end of grief.

Better to never have to deal with the problem in the first place.

Ask your ladies out for weekdays and weekday evenings, making sure to never see any one of them more than once a week – ten days, or so. More and they start seeing you as a boyfriend (even if you say you aren’t one), less and it’s just plain rude unless she’s totally down with being basically just a jump-off (yes, there are ladies like that out there).

Keep your ladies well-managed and yourself outta trouble.

How To Date Multiple Women: Unplug Your Umbilical Cord

Next, unplug your umbilical cord from your DumbPhone and stop with all this texting.

It’s lame and un-manly.

We always tell our guys that a major key to success with women is giving them the gift of missing you.

How can they ‘miss’ you when you’re constantly up their butts with text messages?

Answer: you can’t!

Skype, Line, What App, Facebook, yada yada may as well be the spawn of the devil when it comes to dating women who have a lot going for them in life.

We’re all about managing and simplifying things for guys when it comes to their interactions with women. All it takes is a one-minute phone call once a week or so to ask her out on a date.

Four women means you’ll be spending about 4 minutes on the phone every week – 6 minutes max.

Compare that with the hours guys typically waste giving themselves carpal tunnel syndrome just so they can ‘get a little.’ C’mon, guys! Just call her up and say,

Hey, Her Name, it’s Dude X. How’re you doing. Fine, thanks for asking. I’m calling to ask you out for a date – billiards and Mexican. We’ll have a lot of fun. Which is better for you, next Tuesday evening or Wednesday. Cool. I’ll pick you up at your place say around 7pm. I had a fun time talking to you. Bye.

That’s all there is to it.

Then – as they say in Las Vegas – you go ‘dark’: You don’t call her, you don’t text her, you have no contact with her.

Let her think you were abducted by aliens or whisked away by the FBI and stashed in Witness Protection.



That gets her missing you and wondering about you (mostly wondering if you’re wondering about her wondering about you, actually).

When guys stop with all the fuzzy-wuzzy Inner Game self-help BS and start utilizing a tight framework of actual measurable, actionable steps that get them consistent positive results, they’ll start to see some real change in their lives.