Learn ‘How To’ With Girls


The best way I can teach you ‘How To’ With Girls, is by telling you the story of a guy I knew that got really good with women, really quickly.

This is the story of a guy called Dan.

Who is Dan?

Dan is not the best looking guy ever. In fact if you asked him six months ago, he would have told you he thought he was ugly.

He has a boring 9 to 5 office job, somewhere like here:

And drives a crappy old mini, like this:

And doesn’t have a lot of money.

Despite all this, Dan can go out (with his friends, or on his own) and meet and attract beautiful women.

But Dan Hasn’t Always Been Like This

A typical night out for Dan just six months ago looked liked this:

Go out with the ‘lads’. Get drunk. See hot girls he would love to meet (i.e. have sex with). Do nothing (though he does want to approach girls). Stare at girls for a few hours. Drink more. Stare more. Drink more.

Go to another bar. Drink more. See more girls. Stare at them a bit more. Talk to mates about how hot the girls are. Do nothing to initiate conversation. Just stare at them.

Go to a club. Drink more. Dance if drunk enough. Try to dance with girls on the dance floor but get no interest. Drink some more. Leave club. Get a kebab/burger. Throw up. Get taxi home. Alone.

Now Dan is your typical guy, about 5’9″ in height, skinny, pale skin, short hair. He wanted desperately to get this ‘dealing with women’ issue handled.

He took action. And now he has mastered it.

It didn’t take him very long, just a few short months. When he goes out now he does not think ‘How to’ with girls. He is not thinking ‘how to impress girls’ or ‘how to get girls’.

So… How Does He Do It?

Now when Dan goes out, it goes more like this:

Friday night. Dan feels good. His emotional state is pretty much under his control. He is happy, feels positive about his life. He knows he has high social value. He feels empowered. He feels like he is control of things. He feels empowered.

Ever since getting this under control, he realizes that his life is going places. He knows he has a future. He has made some amazing friends that are also in this position, he finally feels like he belongs.

Dan spends about 15 minutes getting ready, he looks sharp but not overdone. He leaves the house with a big smile on his face. This is his time to shine, he knows he’s gonna have a great time.

Tonight he’s going out alone. He gets into his car and drives to town. He will not be getting drunk tonight. He thought he used to have to, for the courage it gave him. But now he knows better.

He prefers to have his wits about him. He prefers to be 100% in the moment. And alcohol takes some of that away from him, dulls his focus, blurs reality.

First bar. Dan immediately goes up to a group of people. They start laughing and joking with him. It looks like he has known these people for years. Truth is, he has never met them before.

He then pulls out a packet of cards and shows something to the group. They go mad at what they are seeing which echoes around the room. Everyone starts looking over, ‘Who is that guy?’

Dan notices a group of three women at a table, trying to not look like they are looking at him. He makes a parting remark, leaves the group he has been chatting with, and approaches the group of young ladies.

He smiles and is quietly confident. Charismatic even.

He starts telling the group a story about horror films; then about an ex-girlfriend; then about his brother. If you overheard what he was saying, it wouldn’t sound like anything special.

But, the girls are visibly glowing, and they share stories from their own life.

They are touching him, and laughing, and looking at each other. They obviously love this guy.

Dan then starts focusing more on one girl than the others. The other two start chatting to each other. Dan then stands up and leads his girl to a nearby table.

They are physically close. He is touching her hand, doing some kind of massage perhaps. She loves it.

They are talking quietly to each other. The girl is looking longingly into Dan’s eyes. Dan tells a story about his grandma, the girl gets overwhelmed and starts to cry.

They hug, then Dan pulls her in close and whispers something into her ear. They look each other in the eyes, inches apart. Dan puts his hand behind her neck and pulls her in.

They kiss sensually for a few seconds. Dan pulls away and playfully hits the girl. She is flushed and laughing, hitting him back.

Dan and the girls move together to a club. They dance, talk and generally have a great time for several hours.

At the end of the night, Dan goes home with his girl.

This may sound impossible but it is not. Anyone can be Dan.

Dan knows what attracts women, and what does not. He has become the kind of man women are naturally attracted to, and you can too.

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Alex Wise served over 5 years as relationship expert helping women from around the world figure out the men in their love lives from an honest, male perspective. Alex is one of the contributors and editors for Loveawake.com dating website. He is passionate about thought leadership writing, and regularly contributes to various career, social media, public relations, branding, and online dating communities.