How to Get What You Want Without Being a Bitch


We’ve all seen it. The woman at the sales counter that can be described in no nicer terms than “raging bitch”. You know, the one who appears to get off on belittling the minimum-wage earning sales clerk for not taking her return or providing her with the level of ass-kissing service she so clearly believes she deserves.

Don’t be that woman!

Sure, we all want to get what we want. That’s a given. But getting what you want might be easier than you think and you won’t have to get security called on you.

Get What You Want without Being a Bitch

Be Nice

Being nice will take you far in your quest to get what you want. And I’m not talking about that sugary-sweet fake nice that women deploy and think no one can tell the difference. People know the difference.

Genuinely being nice to the person whose assistance you require will put you ahead of the game. Everyone likes to be treated with respect, have their time valued, and know that they are appreciated. Approaching them with a smile and asking politely for their help is the best way to break the ice in any situation.

Be Specific

Do your homework before you employ someone’s assistance, so you’re sure to get what you want. No one enjoys being sent on a wild goose chase for something you “think” you saw somewhere. Same goes for asking for something that’s not on the menu, but you are sure you have had before.

Have your facts straight and try to provide them with as much useful and specific information as you can to help them assist you. Knowing that you took the time to try to help yourself prior to dragging them in to help you shows the person that you value their time. Plus it will make them more willing to help you get what you are after.

Recognize If You Are Inconveniencing Someone

If you are being particularly high maintenance, or making a complicated request that he or she wouldn’t normally be expected to provide or assist you with, own it. By recognizing the fact that you are asking for something that is out of the normal realm of expectations, you are letting the person know you realize it’s an extraordinary request and it will require them to go above and beyond.

This is especially important if you are asking someone to stay past the end of their shift to help you. It sucks to work late, but it sucks worse if you think the person asking you to do it doesn’t really give a shit about your time. Again I say, don’t be that woman!

Show Your Appreciation

Assuming that your polite and specific request has been accommodated, make sure you express your appreciation to the person that helped make that happen. If it is a situation where a tip would be appropriate, make sure you are generous. If it is an environment where it’s not appropriate to tip, ask to speak to his/her manager so you can give them your glowing comments of appreciation for a job well done, or go to the company’s website and send a comment that way if the manager is not available.

If you have asked an employee to stay late, help on a project, or otherwise go beyond their job description, give them credit, thank them, or mention to your boss how helpful they were. Most importantly, say “Thank You!”. Those two simple words are often taken for granted but when said with sincerity, and in a timely manner, they still hold a lot of impact to the person on the receiving end.

Even if your request can’t be fulfilled as you desire, thank the person for his/her time in attempting to assist you. It really might be something is out of their control or can’t be immediately resolved, so throwing a tantrum or shooting the messenger is just going to make you look like a bitch. Getting what you want doesn’t have to be that hard. Being polite, specific, and aware of someone else’s time can go a long ways towards a positive outcome. Being appreciative for the assistance and giving credit where it’s due is a good way to say thank you.

Not flipping the bitch switch or acting like a brat? That’s being a grown