I hear it all the time from guys: “there just aren’t any good women out there, all the good ones are taken.”
When I ask what they mean by a good woman they reply, “a woman who loves me for who I am, and doesn’t judge me, is completely loyal, and thinks about me and only me, no other men ever.”
Clearly any guy who believes this is living in delusion and denial. Instead of making it his business to understand the true nature of women, he prefers to hide behind what he believes “should be” and will always wonder why he is alone.
Denying reality will get you nowhere in life except older, poorer, and lonelier. Seeking to understand it and making decisions based on that understanding is what gets you results.
For example, I get lots of guys who moan about the long videos and long copy websites I write, record, and send them to. They say it’s too long, and ask why don’t you just put together a very short summary.
In person, I always pause, and look at them, waiting for enlightenment to occur. On rare occasion it does, most I have to explain a reality to them: if I could write a one page description, mail it as a postcard, or put it on a website and people would buy from that, I’d have done it a long time ago and retired with my riches.
But reality doesn’t work like that. In order to sell someone something, you have to do a very thorough sales job in a website or a direct mail piece, and that takes a long time or a lot of effort. Many business owners who go broke deny this reality. I chose to understand and accept it a long time ago, even if my preference was the easy way.
When it comes to women, you have to make it your life’s work to understand them. Many women don’t even understand themselves, and just as frustrated by the actions of other women as you are. Yet, with some study and application you can start to see patterns in female behavior, and when you do that, you begin to understand women.
It is somewhat fashionable to pose the question, “what DO women want?” then pretend like the answer is ethereal and mysterious. I assure you, it is not—any man who has worked to understand women knows all they want is to feel that giddy sense of attraction and chemistry around a man. That feeling is created and killed by male behavior, nothing more, nothing less.
Just like men, women act out of self interest. No woman is going to devote her entire existence to any man, unless she’s a masochist. She won’t think about you and only you. But, if you understand what she really wants is to feel attraction and chemistry, and you act in a way that creates or sustains that, then she will go out of her way to make you feel great. Men who understand women experience that. Men who deny reality never will.
