If you’ve ever watched a Howcast video, you know that they are a little on the, well, ridiculous side. This one, while still infused with the silly music and cheesy couple, still contains good advice.
For someone with an STD, this is perhaps one of the most dreaded parts of dating. No one wants to tell their date that they have an STD, but the truth is, unless you want to find yourself embroiled in the middle of an ugly lawsuit, there really is no option.
As pointed out, be prepared. You need to be armed with the necessary medical information. You need to know what the hell you’re talking about concerning the risks, preventative measures and other pertinent information.
You will also most certainly need privacy. The last thing you need is a family member or roommate to come busting in on the middle of your conversation. A public place, such as a restaurant, is probably not the best option either.
Don’t let yourself get caught up in the middle of a mess of emotions. In this case, it’s better to be matter of fact. Getting emotional will only make the situation more difficult than it already is.
If it goes well and your date doesn’t run for the hills, you will need to be prepared for safe sex so you don’t put your partner at risk as well.
So, how do you actually tell him? Here is how to do it in 7 steps.
Step 1:
Have the talk before you have sex. This may very well seem like a gimme, but we all know how easy it is to get caught up in the moment. Waiting until that moment could result in a) your partner running like hell or b) you not telling him after all. Then, well, you’ve really screwed things up.
Step 2:
Break the news in person. Your partner deserves this. Your lack of courage is no excuse to tell via text or email.
Step 3:
Pick a good time and place to break the news. As mentioned above, you aren’t going to want to have to deal with interuptions.
Step 4:
Again, deliver the news in a matter of fact way and don’t let your emotions get the best of you. It’s an awful talk to have to have, but getting emotional will seriously only make it worse. Stress how common STDs are. In fact, 19 million new STD cases are reported in the U.S. each year. You’re not a dating pariah, only someone who trusted someone they shouldn’t have.
Step 5:
Ask them if they’ve been tested. They may have an STD and not even know. Many STDs just kind of hang out without signs or symptoms and you’d be surpised how many people don’t get tested.
Step 6:
Again, take precautions so that you don’t pass it on to your partner. Condoms are really an inexpensive way to keep him safe.
Step 7:
If the worst happens and your date rejects you, just walk away and move on. Someone who rejects you in this situation is not someone you want in your life anyway.
