As you know, we are huge advocates of meeting women during the day. There’s no loud music, they’re sober (at least we hope the women you’re approaching are!) and there’s no competition from other guys. However, a lot of guys only learn how to approach women one way during the day and this is as limiting as guys who only know how to attract women at bars and clubs.
So here is my 7 step list to meeting, attracting and getting the number of a women in a shop or a supermarket.
- Approach her the moment you see her. Don’t hesitate, as this will create an awkward atmosphere and make you seem creepy. Also, the longer you leave it the more time you’re giving yourself to over-think things.
- Make contact. Be direct but not aggressive, simply say something like “Excuse me. I noticed you over here and I knew if I didn’t come and say ‘Hi’, I’d never get to meet you. My name’s X…”
- Transition. She will almost certainly respond well to this, but it’s important to back it up with something afterwards. A simple way to do this is to ask “So do you live round here?”. If she does and you do too, then you can talk about that. If she doesn’t and you do, you can joke about what she’s doing on your turf. If she does and you don’t, you can talk about why you are there. It’s pretty much a fool-proof transition.
- Keep the conversation light and funny. A classic thing to talk about in shops and supermarkets is what’s in her basket. You can take a look through and make some assumptions based on her items. “So I see you’re buying pizza and pasta… let me guess, you’re a Mafioso crime boss on the run but you’re craving the taste of the old country!”
- Move the conversation towards going out / socialising, this will make it a smoother transition when you ask her out. Find out what she does for fun and try and find some commonality. Be honest though, if you’ve never heard of the places she mentions say “I don’t know anything about that, but I’d love to know more…”
- Go for the number. If you’ve done the above right and also made sure your body language, tonality and eye contact has been good, then it should be easy. Make sure you refer to something she’s mentioned about going and out e.g “Well if you like X bar, it’d be great to meet you there for a drink. Stick your number in here and we can sort it out”.The most important bit here is to keep it relaxed and casual. Don’t ask her “So can I have your number?” as this breaks the mood and it’s more likely she’ll say no. If you assume that she’ll give you the number and mention it in context of doing something in the future, it should be a natural reaction for her to hand it over.
- Once you’ve got the number, give her a call there and then. This is to make sure the number works, but also so that she can save your number and will recognise it when you call or text. Tell her you’ll be in touch soon and say goodbye. You can give her a hug or shake her hand, but if you do make sure it’s firm and hold it for just longer than you would normally to add a slightly sexual note to it. After all, you don’t want to unravel all that great work you’ve just done by making her think she’s leaving a business meeting.
I’m not going to pretend this is a 100% guaranteed magic spell that will work every time. Of course there will be times when, for one reason or another, she won’t be comfortable giving you the number (she’s married, she’s having a really bad day and doesn’t want to talk etc). However, if you follow these simple rules, you will drastically increase the number of women you are able to meet in your day to day life and also become much more confident doing so.