To the loyal readers who come to this website, many of you may come to expect that I talk a lot about dating. This is great, seeing as dating is a huge topic that many people write about and discuss, yet know so little about. They tend to look at dating as a one-size fits all approach, as if every single guy and girl will always act the same under the same circumstances and environment.
Some men and women will actually make the first move, while others will sit by waiting for the perfect moment to position themselves in the right location in order to so conveniently meet that other person of their dreams. Others will cut through all the normal steps and B.S., and walk right up and introduce themselves. Sometimes this approach will work and other times it won’t.
Then there are other factors that can also change the whole dynamic of meeting another person. Has the person been drinking? Did someone else walk up to that person and say something inappropriate a few seconds before you showed up? Maybe that person just had a bad day or just broke up with their significant other.
Of course, there’s always the fact that you are looking for love in all the right places. For those who come here often, you already know how much I despise the idea of meeting someone in a bar or club. Not only does the other person expect you to be there to pick someone up for casual sex, but the ones you are able to pick up most likely go home with other people all the time. Do you really want to take run the risk of getting a disease by sleeping with someone you hardly know and who may have slept with hundreds of other people?
There are many people out there these days who don’t want relationships or don’t have a problem cheating on their husbands or wives. And with people being more open to sleeping around without being married these days, including with the same sex, your risk goes up even more now. A guy might not have only slept with fifty women but also fifty men for all you know. Same thing with women. And you have no clue as to whether they practice safe sex or not. With everybody sleeping around these days, even a condom can’t protect you against every disease out there.
And then there are relationships that everybody wants to give you advice about as if they know your circumstances exactly or what your significant other is thinking. They will tell you that the other person doesn’t love you or is cheating on you without knowing all the facts. Many experts tend to forget that when people get into a relationship, there’s always going to be something that the other person does that annoys you. Maybe he or she makes a noise when drinking their tea in the morning that just irks you to no end. He or she may stay out a bit after work because they have a few things on their mind and the best way to figure it out is having time alone. That person might not even communicate well at some times because they have insecurities and are afraid of what you might think if they tell you.
Many dating experts and even family members will make snap judgements about a relationship without having the ability to look at it from a realistic point of view. This tends not to provide any benefits to the person that needs the advice. When it comes to meeting someone or working on your relationship, don’t listen to others who have their own agendas, because most of the time they are completely wrong. Instead use good, common sense and work on talking to the other person you love in a calm and non-judgmental way. Make sure that you listen to how they feel and try to see things from their point of view. A lot of times after really looking at a situation, you will learn that you were making assumptions that were completely wrong and sabotaging your own relationship without even knowing it.
If you do need a professional after all this, don’t listen to the commercialized dating experts that talk a big game but really don’t know anything at all. Shop around and choose wisely from a real expert and not a television one. After all, many people truly aren’t professionals and communication with your loved one is usually the most effective option.