Why Can’t Men Be Honest When Breaking Up With You


Breaking up a relationship is not rocket science, or at least, it shouldn’t be. But looking at how our men go about it, you would think that it indeed is! We have all heard the lines; “All I need right now is some space”, “I need to figure out what I need” and the all time classic, “It’s not you, it’s me”. So here is why it becomes rocket science for men to break up with you

Poor Communication

Men are not the most eloquent of species but this is especially so when they are breaking up with you. They have no problem going on and on about sports or the stock market or electronic gadgets but when it comes to feelings or their lack thereof, they are stumped!

He Genuinely Does Not Wish to Hurt You

Yes, I realize that this sounds lame, but it is absolutely true. You have been in that relationship for a while now and he actually cares about you, yes, seriously. The thing that he is actually avoiding most is seeing you cry and so even though he is breaking up with you because he just got back with his ex, he will tell you that he needs some space if only to spare both of you the agony of seeing you cry.

True, Unadulterated Honesty is Over-rated

There, I said it. No, I am not making excuses for and siding with liars out there but look at it this way. He may seem shallow if he told you that he was leaving because you have gained 10 pounds since the two of you met. He may seem brutal if he tells you that you don’t excite him anymore and that the allure is gone. And frankly speaking, who wants to hear that? Who wants to be undermined and their self esteem trodden on? I’m not seeing any hands raised! And so men lie. When they are breaking up with you, they apply political correctness and use euphemisms which do not leave you feeling like you want to crawl under a rock and stay there. Whether this strategy is helpful for long term development and self-improvement or not is however, debatable

In It For The Benefits

This is when the relationship has been over for weeks or months. He knows it, you don’t and he doesn’t want to forfeit his benefits just yet. This is in the guise of “finding the right time” and “setting the atmosphere “and so on. So when the time finally comes that he is breaking up with you, he can’t admit that he has been using you and you can’t understand what he is saying because you thought that everything was going great!

He Needs To Keep His Options Open

If you are looking for closure, close. Do not wait for your man to give you expounded reasons for breaking up with you. Women like closure, men do not. Men like to keep their options open and you are one of those options. As such, he needs to leave things with you amicable and with loose threads just in case he decides to come back in any capacity whatsoever. It is your responsibility to tie them up if you don’t want them to run amok.