Have you ever been so close to having the job, relationship, car, vacation, or whatever it is that you want but something happens that seems to prevent you from actually having that desire come into fruition?
What is it that appears to be standing in your way?
When I’ve been in such a place, I sometimes delude myself into thinking that it’s another person, a governmental entity or another outside force that is the spoiler. This delusion is the “easy way” to deal with my frustration and disappointment that what I want is not happening anytime soon.
Unfortunately, this “easy way” also gives all of the creative power to somebody or some entity outside myself. I am off the hook, so to speak, but I am also left feeling quite a bit helpless.
When I really look at what’s going on in my life and I ask myself why I’m not living the ecstatically happy and blissfully abundant experience I crave, I am the main reason why.
Of course, I have so much that’s going wonderfully in my life. I appreciate and acknowledge how truly blessed I am. And of course, I do not live in a vacuum. There are other people, institutions and organizations that impact my life.
But it’s time to stop pretending that these outside forces are determining my experience!
Who’s closing the door?
Almost every single one of us short-circuit our own desires to lesser and greater degrees.
As much as you claim that you want to start your own business, meet your perfect partner or travel the world, it’s quite likely that the reason you haven’t moved closer to realizing these aspirations is you. Even if what you want is not a huge change or move from what you know right now, you can still stand in your own way.
Sometimes we put up obstacles to what we want because we actually don’t want those things– or we feel conflicted. Perhaps you come from a family of doctors and, by default, you have always wanted to be a doctor.
Or rather, you want to be a doctor because that’s what you’ve known and that’s what seems to be expected of you. So you shove aside your urge to paint or dance or cook or whatever is calling to you and you trudge along toward this supposed goal.
When your heart is not in whatever it is you are doing, it makes perfect sense that you would drag yourself along– possibly even kicking and screaming!
Other times you are clearer about what you want, but you don’t feel deserving of actually having it. So many of us lug around old beliefs about ourselves, the world and others from our past.
It could very well be that those old beliefs contribute to you feeling unworthy or incapable of realizing your dreams. It’s much like the proverbial self-fulfilling prophecy. You expect yourself to mess up when it really counts– with your partner, your kids, your friends and at work– and so you do.
So when the breakup happens, the fights occur or the promotion never comes, you are not surprised.
Clear it up.
Blues singer Keb Mo offers this melodic advice in one of his songs: “Get out the way and let your light shine.” These are wonderfully wise words…but don’t always seem easy to do!
In order to get out of your own way and start manifesting what you want in life, it’s vital that you clear up your self-limiting habits. You may or may not be aware of the beliefs that you hold. It might be helpful to take some time and explore exactly what you believe– about yourself, other people and life in general.
Simply noticing what it is you believe and acknowledging that these beliefs might have made sense at one time in your past is a great start.
When you uncover a belief, ask yourself if it feels open and expansive or closed and limiting. You can clue into this by paying attention to what happens in your body when you focus in on a particular thought.
What happens to your shoulders, your jaw, the pit of your stomach? Even a slight tension or sense of holding can signal that a particular thought or belief is keeping you stuck.
I don’t advise you to start re-living your past, but it can be extremely helpful to offer yourself extra love and care around those tight and tense areas that link to the limiting beliefs that might be rooted in your past.
For example, When I realize that I hold the belief that it is not safe for me to speak up about how I truly feel, I can choose to extend love to that part of myself that is clinging to this belief. I can acknowledge that this belief made sense in my past and that it is no longer serving me.
I can gently remind myself that I have the power to make a different choice in this present moment. Rather than attempting to shove away or condemn myself for holding on to old and outmoded ways of being, I can lovingly make a shift.
You might find that you need to make a completion about something in the past that is lending extra intensity to your beliefs. If so, I encourage you to do so.
Remember to be gentle and loving with yourself. Know that you have the power to clear up your thoughts and create space for new ways of living.
Allow for the unfolding.
Once you are clear about what you want and you’ve begun to shift away from those limiting beliefs that hold you back, you might experience a rush of manifestation.
It does sometimes happen like that.
You experience a breakthrough in understanding how you’ve been standing in your own way; you make a completion and let go of a past habitual way of thinking and BAM something you’ve been wanting just comes to you– without any struggle, trouble or fight.
It’s fabulous when manifesting occurs in this way.
But it doesn’t always happen like this. When your dreams are taking their own sweet time to come to fruition, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you are doing anything “wrong.”
Keep checking in with yourself and stay aware of how you are feeling. Open, relaxed and enjoying life are always beneficial states of being for manifesting!
That new car you’ve been dreaming of may not be sitting in your driveway yet. You can continue to line yourself up to receive the vehicle you’ve been desiring while appreciating your older model.
Allow what you want to unfold. Don’t try to force it or try to “make” your dreams happen. Instead, keep expanding, learning and growing. Act when you are inspired to act, even when it seems crazy or different than what you’d usually do.
Remind yourself that you are supported, loved and worthy. Cultivate trust in yourself, your inner knowing and your Source.
As you let these truths fill your thinking and your whole being, there is literally nothing you cannot do!