If you’re wondering why your questions don’t get answered, there’s a simple answer: volume. We get more questions than we can possibly answer. Ever. Even if we answered ten a day for the rest of our lives. Such is the downside of popularity; you can’t please everyone. In our case, you can only please a few.
The good news is that there are ways to make your question stand out, and I’m about to list them for you. What can I say, I have a giver’s heart. Doing these things is no guarantee that yours will be answered, but it won’t hurt your odds.
1) Keep it brief
A little background is fine, but please, be concise. We don’t need the entire history, just the most relevant info. In most cases, the longer the question, the less chance it has of being answered. We’re just like you: long paragraphs of text make our eyes glaze over.
2) Speak English
If we can’t read your question, we certainly can’t answer it. We aren’t grammar/ spelling Nazis, and we get that you must abbreviate to make it fit sometimes, but at least make it legible, because gobbledy-gook (l33t), jibba-jabba (ev werd lk ur txtg) and otherwise unreadable questions are like kryptonite.
3) Be original
We have to mix things up. If one of us answered a question last week about long-distance relationships, chances are he’s not going to answer another one this week. Save it for later or try a different guy.
4) Broad themes, not individual circumstances
Does that guy from work like you? Is your boyfriend not calling because he’s cheating? Did your date stop kissing you because you had bad breath? Don’t take this the wrong way, but how the feck should we know? We aren’t clairvoyant. We can answer questions about guys in general, but only your dude knows why he dumped you or if he likes skinny jeans on girls or how he wants you to groom your pubes. Better to ask him than us.
5) Repeat yourself
Ask it again; maybe we missed it. Or ask another guy, because the one you asked might not know the answer. It does happen.
Yeah, yeah, I know what you’re thinking: “So many rules!” They aren’t rules, they are suggestions–like doubling-down when showing an ace or splitting eights. It doesn’t mean you will win, but it sure as heck will improve your chances.