No matter how hard we try and convince ourselves that we really don’t need a man and the hassles of dating and we’re just fine on our own, we have to admit that men and romance have an important place in our lives. (At times we even live vicariously through others.)
Having the right man (aka. Your man) can make your life easier and more comfortable and give you amazing opportunities to experience yourself in ways that are not possible when you’re single.
So how can you attract your man? Especially when you’ve tried everything you can think of to do!
The good news is you usually don’t have to work harder or stress as much as you do now. You just have to learn how to look at relationships in a new way.
It starts with how you think.
In my coaching programs, I spend as much time teaching how to reframe who we are in relationships in a way that serves us as I do the understanding and information on how we act and communicate differently as men and women.
Why? Because it’s through understanding who we are in relationship that makes all the difference in how we relate to another.
When we reframe our attitudes and belief systems around relationships, then combine them with the understanding of how we operate as men and women we dramatically increase our chances of having a long-term, successful, intimate relationship!
To help you start rethinking and bringing love into your life, here are six mantras you can say to help you meet and marry your man.
Mantra #1: “I am responsible for my relationship success.”
We alone are responsible for our relationship success (or lack of it.) Know that where you are right now in terms of relationship success is a direct result of your own actions. Blaming other people or circumstances will prevent you from moving forward in love.
If you truly believe your circumstances are attributable to the actions of others and that you were powerless and had no control over your situation, you are also powerless to change your life now. The good news is, accepting responsibility for your relationship success gives you complete permission and the power to build the future you’ve always wanted.
We are responsible in creating our own lives–life doesn’t just happen to us. You need to believe the same if you want to improve your love life and your romantic relationships.
Mantra #2: “I learn about relationships from people who have successful romantic relationships.”
Consider who are you taking relationship advice from: single friends and family who struggle with dating and divorce, single dating coaches or successful mentors who have proven they know how to make a marriage last?
Successful people take advice from more successful people than they are in most businesses as well as love. They also continually learn and advance their knowledge about relationships, communication and what it takes to have a long-term, intimate, continuous relationship. Take time to learn from those who know and get support.
Mantra #3: “I take care of myself first.”
Until you learn how to really take care of yourself, the universe will not support you. Learning to love and take care of yourself requires discipline. It means not doing something for someone else unless you feel good about doing it.
It means taking care of yourself by working out, eating well, getting rest and staying away from toxic men and toxic situations.
If you don’t take care of yourself and feel good, you ain’t good for anyone else.
Mantra #4: “I am open, available and receptive.”
When you want a romantic relationship, you must be open and available to receive what the universe presents. Are you seeing opportunities, potential dates and romance? Or are you seeing no available men, no dates and only geeks?
Love comes from unexpected places. Often we’re quick to judge the external package before getting to know the person inside. Do your best to stay open, available and receptive to those who present on your path.
Mantra #5: “I love to receive – especially from men.”
If you have trouble receiving what a man has to offer, you probably have trouble receiving love in relationships. It’s amazing how we think we’re receiving when we really aren’t.
It can be as simple as when a man says, “what a beautiful dress” and we respond, “Oh this? I got it on sale.” Without receiving the man’s compliment, we slam what he has to offer and deny his joy of giving.
This is something we need to work on constantly. Next time a man gives you a compliment, an invitation or a phone call, simply smile and say, “Thank you. I appreciate that.”
Mantra #6: “I enjoy giving back in appreciation.”
Just recently I was speaking with a friend over lunch. She was telling me about a new man she’s been seeing and how nice it is that he has taken her out several times.
When I asked her how she was giving back in appreciation, she looked at me and said, “I thought it was the man’s responsibility to take me out.” It is initially, however when a man takes you out two or three times, give him something back in appreciation.
Cook him a meal. Send him a card. Invite him to a concert or dinner party. Men like to feel appreciated for their generosity. It’s important for you to acknowledge and reward him when he does something nice for you.